Passing of the torch

While I was working on Karen's obituary today I was thinking a little about her mantra of "I am going to beat this. I have plans for tomorrow."  In talking to Karen a while ago I realized that when she came up with the mantra it was not in reference to cancer.  I think instead it was related to the deep despair and hopelessness she felt one lonely night in the hospital after she was diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer.  She was determined to not let those emotions overwhelm her and ruin the limited number of tomorrows she had left.  I think it was also a way for her to comfort me.  And it worked.

Now I think of her and remember that saying and, as the same feelings threaten me, I find myself determined to not let my own emotions spoil the limited number of tomorrows I have left with our children.  So I repeat this to myself and every time I hear Karen's beautiful voice saying, "You're going to beat this.  I have made plans for you tomorrow."  After which I hear her laugh a little and say, "Or I'm going to beat you!"  So the mantra torch has been passed to me and I need to start planning.

Below is the obituary.  I had a hard time starting this so my mother began it and I fleshed out the details.

Braden

Karen Rawlings Hoth was born May 24, 1979 in Preston, Idaho to Glade and Georgia (Ingalls) Rawlings and passed away April 23, 2016 in North Logan, Utah.  She was the 5^th child and 4^th daughter.  The family moved to Logan, Utah in 1986 where Karen attended school and graduated from Logan High School in 1997.  She later earned a Bachelors degree in Geography from Utah State University.  She began work delivering papers before her teenage years and worked many jobs throughout her life.  She knew the value of hard work which made her a favorite of her employers.

 Karen was gifted with intelligence and a quick wit coupled with an indomitable and compassionate spirit that drew friends to her.  She held many church callings for which she always put forth her best effort.  In those callings she touched the lives of many and ever looked for opportunities to reach out and serve others.  She loved word and number puzzles and was always busy creating something beautiful out of her handwork whether it was tatting, crocheting or bobbin lace.  She had a green thumb and loved working with her plants, indoors and out.

She married her long-time friend, Braden August Hoth, August 9, 2001, in the Logan Temple.  After many long years of waiting and a heartbreaking miscarriage in 2011 they were blessed with two beautiful children, James in 2013 and Rebecca in 2014.

She is survived by her husband – Braden, children – James and Rebecca, parents – Glade and Georgia Rawlings, and siblings – Jeanette Johnson, Phillip Rawlings, Ruthann Wadsworth, Emily Walker, and Diana Ribera.  A large extended family and innumerable friends mourn her passing.

Her strong spirit carried her through a courageous battle with cancer, never losing her faith in God or her love of family.  She and her family are grateful for the outpouring of help and support she received from those, both known and unknown, during her fight.  One of her greatest desires in life was to be a mother so it is no surprise that family, especially her children, always came first for her.  While we mourn here those who have passed on before are celebrating their sweet reunion with a choice daughter of God.

There will be a viewing Tuesday evening, April 26, 2016, at the North Logan 9^th Ward Chapel, 1650 East 2600 North, North Logan, from 6:00 – 8:00 p.m.  Funeral services will be held at the same location on Wednesday, April 27, 2016, at noon.  A viewing will precede services from 10:00 to 11:30 a.m.  Services are under the direction of the Cache Valley Mortuary.  Burial will be at the North Logan Cemetery.