Most of the time it's a lot of fun to watch and listen to the kids play. Sometimes, especially when they can't get outside, they have too much energy for me. It seems like they are literally bouncing off of the walls. A couple of times I have actually asked them to run up and down the stairs 10 times to burn off some of that energy!
All together.
They were excited to help
Trying on daddy's suit coat.
Family still continues to help with the kids. I am very grateful for their help and the blessing they are to us. Around the holidays there are times when the loneliness and sense of loss just hits me in the gut. For some reason this year was harder in some ways than the past 2 years. I think part of it is some frustration combined with not getting enough sleep and exercise. That means there is something I can do about it. Another thing I would like to do is just spend more time having fun with the kids. Today I sat and held James while we watched a football game on TV. It was one of those perfect moments that help get me through the hard days.
Headstands on the couch - no hands, dad!
She built the tower all by herself
James in his new suit!
Funny faces for the camera!
Christmas was good with lots of family and time with the kids. Without Karen around sometimes it still feels lonely. That loneliness sometimes makes it feel as though I don't belong. It's ironic but when I feel that I don't want to socialize much which can actually make it more difficult for me to get rid of the loneliness. Another term for it could be a feedback loop. When I'm lonely I don't want to get out so I end up feeling more alone. On the other side of that if I get out and have some fun or socialize then I don't feel lonely and am more likely to feel like being involved. Hopefully that makes sense!
Becca's gifts with her old helmet to remind her to wear it.
James's gifts (the helmet was already his and was a reminder for him to wear his helmet when riding the new skateboard.
Daddy's gifts on Christmas.
So one of the cool experiences over Christmas was a gift the kids received from an aunt, one of Karen's sisters. Before Karen passed she had acquired a pattern for a homemade kids tee-pee. When going through her sewing stuff a while back Karen's mom found the pattern and liberated it for Karen's sister to use. The result is one of those cool little things that happen. It makes me wonder how many more times Karen can help with a gift for the kids!
The tee-pee
I tried something new this year with the kids and had them pick out a present for each other. Both wanted Legos when I talked to them. So I helped each in turn pick out some Legos for their sibling. The way I look at it this is a way for them to learn how to give and not just receive at Christmas or other times.
They bought each other a set of Legos for Christmas.
Becca loves grandma!
I originally started to write a post a couple of weeks ago but never finished it. When I came back to continue it almost everything was out of date and it needed to be started over. While looking over the post and thinking about what to write the realization hit that there is a parallel to life, a lesson for me to learn. If something is started and then not followed through on it can become obsolete or rotten in a way. Friendships, family relationships, and other interpersonal relationships can be the same way. When neglected or not nourished they can become stale or stagnant. The things that matter most in life need consistent and devoted attention. Now I know something I will be working on this next year!
Happy New Year everyone!
Braden
