Keeping it positive and a small request...

So I have made it through one of the most stressful anniversary weeks with no tears and only feeling down on Saturday when I went searching through our storage unit for some games.  Once the emotions started flooding back I decided it was time to stop looking and head home without the games.  I hosted a get together with games and treats for others who have lost a spouse.  We had a good time and mostly talked about life in the aftermath and swapped some funny stories.  All in all it was some good and much needed therapy.

Becca is a little cold at the dinner table.

Tuesday Becca will turn 4 and she has asked for a pink dump truck.  We'll see if I can pull that one off.  If not I will be running to the store in the next day or two to buy a doll instead.  Wish me luck!  Apparently James has been asked Becca, "Where do you want to go to eat for your birthday?" He even offered a suggestion, "Pizza Pie Cafe is a good place to go.  That's where I want to go for my birthday."  On paper it sounds so normal but when it's coming out of the mouth of a 4 year old it's hilarious!

Pasta is yummy!

Bed time and James has me in a choke hold!

My kids keep me on my toes and give me the courage to keep moving forward.  Even with them sometimes the loneliness is more acute than usual.  This past week was one of those times and was made worse by some bad timing.  Honestly, there isn't a 'good' time for a relationship to end.  Before Valentines Day rather than after is better.  And yes, we did break up the Saturday before Valentines Day.  It was on the anniversary of the day Karen went into the hospital 4 years ago.  I did have several days worth of warning which was a tender mercy.  Still,  I could wish for better timing, but hey, at least I didn't have to pay for a dinner date and then have a break up happen.  That's a definite plus in the book of practical and frugal!

After this last experience I decided rather than sit around and mope that I would dive back in.  In the last few weeks I have been reviewing how I handle changes and bad situations.  The conclusion I have come to is that I spend far too much time analyzing, reevaluating, thinking, and agonizing about the past.  It can't be changed and I just need to move on rather than dwell in the past.  With that in mind I actually ended up going out on a date with a good friend on Friday.  We had some fun and were able to catch up.  The next thing I did was send a message to a neighbor who had mentioned setting me up with someone they knew.

And lastly, I will be doing more to actively seek opportunities to go on dates instead of simply hanging out.  That means I am shamelessly appealing to friends and family to help in this process.  If you know me and know of someone I might like to get to know then send me an email or text, leave a comment here, or send me a PM on Facebook.  If you feel like introducing me to someone I won't be offended.  Two things I would like to say first.  First, I want the chance to ask questions about the person.  Second, based on the answers to those questions I reserve the right to decline.  I want to avoid any hurt feelings if that is my decision.  I accept that a friend or relative may try to set me up with someone who doesn't want to be set up with me and I'm fine with the other party saying no.  Not everyone is comfortable with the idea of even a single date with a widower who has two young kids.  There is pressure in any dating situation and I would like to avoid adding to it.

Braden